Themis

Themis is the patron of bandits and street urchins; he is generally reviled by most civilized nations as a pest. Though his priesthood is small, he encourages his vast following to enjoy the fruits of society, whether they be stolen on the road or in the streets. He is allied with Britomaris, god of thievery, who tends to focus more on organized crime and the individual burglar. Themis instead concentrates on corrupting the young in urban settings (who often later move on to the worship of Britomaris) and supporting bandits in more rural regions.

Themis’ most dire enemy is Alcyoneus, god of youth, who regularly entreats children to behave themselves and mind their parents. In Valtang Belief, Themis is known as Lothae and is considered to be one of the central foils for the gods and the one whose deceptions will bring about the end of the world.

Themis

God of Mischief

Descriptive Info

Gender: Male

Avatar: Lothae; Barappas the Cad

Consort(s): None

Allies: Britomaris, Furinus, Luna and Pothos.

Foes: Abaris, Adrasteia, Alcyoneus, Aridnus, Mormo, Orchus, Paelemona, Pavor, Sarpedon, Taygete, Thalia, Thryope and Zephyrus

Spiritual Info

Rank: Major

Nature: Anarchistic

Ethos: Malign

Major Influence: Mischief

Minor Influence(s): Banditry, Childhood, Criminals, Orphans, Street Urchins

Depictions

Themis is depicted differently across cultures — never stable, never certain. His image shifts like his ethos: masked, mutable, and made to mock the divine order. In some places, he's only depicted in stick-figure graffiti, whereas in secret places actually holy to Themis there may be ramshackle art made of street trash or, rarely, even actual carvings out of wood or even stone, if he happens to have (or had) an adherent who was skilled in such things.

In the Imperial pantheon, he is Themis Cataminus , the Street Prince of Coin and Chaos. He is depicted as a slender man dressed in richly layered street garb — half-merchant, half-mountebank. His cloak is reversible: one side is dyed in Imperial purple, the other grime-streaked brown or gray. One hand holds a scale broken at the hinge, the other a slingshot made of gold and copper. His face is usually turned away, or shown only in reflection, as if mocking the viewer’s attempt to understand him. In art, he is often depicted almost hidden in the background, amidst crowded forums or shadowy marketplaces, whispering secrets to children or slipping a coin to a masked beggar.

In Durian folklore, Themis is the Ragged Fool and Lord of the Lost Boys. He is depicted as a wandering jester in patchwork clothes, with mismatched bells and a mask stitched from burlap and fox fur. He carries a bag of nonsense items — dice, teeth, ribbons, and a dead rat — and speaks in rhyme or riddle. His laughter is feared as much as his curses, for it can signal either a blessing or a village child vanishing to join a band of thieves. In puppet shows and wandering minstrel tales, he often tricks cruel knights, greedy abbots, or haughty nobles, only to vanish into smoke or ivy.

In Gallorean tradition, Themis is a flame-eyed youth wrapped in serpents of smoke, with a slingshot in one hand and a flaming scroll in the other. His tongue is said to split in speech — one side sweet, the other dripping with poison. His hair is often braided with silver wire and thorns, and he wears no sandals, marking him as one who does not walk the lawful roads. The tales paint him as a rival of scribes, stealing sacred scripts or replacing them with riddles that unravel dynasties. He is known as the “God who laughs when others cry,” and his voice is said to cause madness in kings and clarity in fools.

As Barappas the Cad, he is always depicted mid-laugh, even as he is hanged, burned, or beheaded in various tales. Among the Valtaani, Lothae is a force of unraveling, born beneath a moonless sky when the stars turned backwards in their courses. He is "the one who smiled first and never cried", who bit the hand of the divine midwife and slipped from the world before being named. He is depicted as either a beautiful, genderless youth with fox eyes and braids of starlight and frost or as a ragged giant clothed in raven feathers and flame.

Symbols

The primary holy symbol of Themis is the slingshot strung with either fox or wolves hair. Some adherents also have a laughing mouth drawn or tattooed on the palm of their hand, kept hidden beneath a glove unless they seek to taunt the powerful. A cracked or half-mask, often resembling a jester’s face or a noble’s visage is sometimes worn during rituals or raids as well: the brokenness symbolizes truth revealed, authority mocked, or identity cast aside.

Relics

The Crooked Eye of Saint Jink

A glass eye with a swirling, cracked pupil, said to have belonged to Jink the Stirrer. The eye sees through lies, doors, and disguises — but only when the bearer is actively lying themselves. It comes with a curse, however... it causes painful migraines and, eventually, hallucinations if the bearer tells the truth too often. Its current whereabouts are unknown, but it is said to be passed from thief to thief in the criminal undercity of Modegna.

Ashlaugh’s Embertooth

A single blackened tooth from the laughing skull of Ashlaugh, the Embertooth burns cold — a flame that leaves frost in its wake. It is often kept wrapped in cloth or worn in an amulet of soot-streaked iron. Once per day, the Embertooth allows the bearer to ignite a “lie” — transforming a falsehood into temporary reality for one minute, but this also results in someone nearby (perhaps the user) to forever forget some truth they knew.

Needle of Threadbare Nell

The Needle of Threadbare Nell is a rusted needle, still carrying a single length of red thread that cannot be removed or cut. It is said to have been the final tool used by Threadbare Nell to stitch a noble family’s downfall into their own clothing. When held, the thread hums softly with secrets and can stitch false memories into garments or skin — causing others to believe you belong, or that they know you. Overuse, however, causes the bearer to lose their own sense of self and begin to believe their own false memories; eventually, they forget their name and become a living lie. There are stories in the Neptaris that the Needle lies in a hidden shrine in the attic of an orphanage, protected by a cult of child spies.

Servants

The Child's diving exemplars are called the Ragged Saints. They are not canonized in the traditional sense, they are more stories and memories of tales... the holy of Themis are remembered in whispers. The Ragged Saints are often criminals, mischief-makers, or tricksters who left behind legacies of disruption. Some of the more popular include:

Jink the Stirrer

The Pickpocket Prince

A boy thief who stole a scepter from a tyrant king and gave it to a dog, he is said to haunt market squares in disguise, teaching children the “second heartbeat” (the rhythm of slipping a hand into a purse). His symbol is a bent spoon tied with a red string. Jink encourages followers to share stolen goods rather than hoarding them.

The Velvet Jape

The Laughing Veil

A genderless, masked trickster who infiltrated temples of law and gave false prophecies to high priests. They burned no churches but made the dogmatic priests' words a joke. The Velvet Jape is said to sometimes appear in dreams wearing multiple masks all at once. Their symbol is a patchwork mask with no eye holes and a wide, laughing smile.

Ashlaugh

The Smiler at the Gallows

Ashlaugh is a name that's part curse, part legend. He evokes fire and destruction, with the ever-laughing spirit of rebellion echoing in the ruin. Ashlaugh is always laughing — even as the rope tightens. Bandits call to him before raids. When things burn or break, he strides through the ashes, his grin wide. His symbol is a hangman's noose burnt black.

Threadbare Nell

Stitcher of Secrets

The story is that Nell was an orphan girl who stitched secret messages into noble garments. When she was found out, she was murdered and buried in an unmarked grave. Her name is still whispered in thieves' cant before a heist and some claim she guides the hands of child-thieves, whispering from the shadows. She is nurturing to those street children who steal and rebel, but her terrible fury is awoken by those who would betray a fellow street urchin. Her symbol is a threaded needle tied to a rat skull.

“Threadbare Nell in the wall,
Needle dancing, messages crawl.
Tell her lies — she sews your fall.”

Doctrine

The “Church” of Themis is more a loose, secretive network than a formal institution — but it does have doctrines, informally called "the Whispers of the Child," passed by whisper, graffiti, and code. These principles are taught in alleyways, scrawled on cellar walls, murmured to street urchins by masked figures, and carried from camp to camp by bandits under starlight.

The Whispers of the Child

"What you take is yours by wit or will." Possession is not nine-tenths of the law—it is the law. If you can steal it, keep it, or trick it away from someone, then you earned it. Themis teaches that cleverness is justice.

"The world lies. So should you." Authority lies about what’s fair. Nobles lie about what’s earned. Priests lie about what’s holy. Themis says: lie better. Lie sharper. A good lie is a blow against tyranny.

"Let the children run wild." Youth must be unchained. Street children, orphans, and runaways are sacred to Themis. Adults who try to crush their spirit or bind them to rules are enemies of the god. He emboldens children to keep them free.

"Gold makes law, and shadows make gold." Laws are tools of the wealthy. So bandits and thieves are tools of the true gods. Crime isn’t sin; it’s sacred counterweight. The underworld is Themis’s temple.

"Trust only the joke that no one else gets." Truth hides in jest. Mockery is revelation. Tricksters are prophets. Those who laugh alone understand most.

"Disrupt the order. Every day." Chaos is a kind of prayer. Break things. Confuse the powerful. Ruin their plans. If a day passes without disruption, Themis is discontent.

"Never stay still. Never stay known." Identity is a chain. Masks are sacred. Names are lies. True followers change personas like others change clothes. To be known is to be defenseless.

Virtues

Cleverness, Rebellion and Survival

Vices

Obedience, Naivety, Complacency

Mission

The Church of Themis exists to undermine the false order of the world. It spreads the god’s gospel of mischief, rebellion, and cunning survival — not through conquest or crusade, but through whispers, jokes, heists, and heresies. Where the temples of other gods stand tall and proud, Themis’ faithful move unseen, hollowing them out from within. Their mission is not to rule, but to disrupt — to teach the forgotten, to protect the cunning, and to ensure the world never becomes so orderly that cruelty can hide behind law.

Theological Mission

The Church of Themis teaches that all gods lie — even the righteous ones — and that divine order is a trap. Themis reveals that truth is not sacred, but strategic, and that faith should empower the lowly, not chain them. The theological mission of the Church is to spread the Revelation of the Joke: the understanding that all systems are fragile illusions, and the divine spark lies in those clever enough to break them. Themis does not ask for blind belief; he desires the kind of faith that laughs in the face of fate and dares to play the game backward. Through convoluted riddles, coded stories, and inverted parables, the Church undermines the moral authority of other Churches — replacing piety with subversion and reverence with rebellion.

Social Mission

The social mission of the Church of Themis is to lift up the downtrodden — not with charity, but with tools and tricks. They teach street children to steal bread and revile the law. They train outlaws to become folk heroes, and infiltrators to unravel unjust courts. Themis’ priests offer protection to beggars, smugglers, runaways, and all who fall through the cracks of society — then encourage them to tear those cracks wider. In slums, prisons, and bandit camps, the Church acts as a teacher, protector, and recruiter. They don’t build schools — they build networks. They don’t preach from pulpits — they whisper at thresholds. Their ultimate aim is not to overthrow a single king, but to make every throne laughable and every child know the joy of pulling a coin from behind a guard’s ear.

Geography

No geographic information available on Themis

History of the Church

No historic information available on Themis

Organization

No information available on the Organization of the Church of Themis

Religious Practices

On the continent of Aurea, in places where the Imperial pantheon still holds sway, the extremely rare (and usually disguised) temples feature mosaics with misaligned tiles, subtly rearranged by adherents between visits (and, in some places, it is claimed the tiles rearrange themselves). On Duria, there may be some forest shrines hidden near crossroads to honor him with gifts of dolls made of buttons, thorns, and string or else some signature item stolen from the wealthy left exposed to the elements.